The Girl who sneezed....

Aanchu! She sneezed,
I said, "God Bless",
And though I had known
Her for years now.



Never had she appeared,
So Sick and Beautiful!
"Cold", she said, "does that to me",
But cold in summer was something I didn't know.


With her pink handkerchief,
She rubbed her red nose,
For in her misery too,
She looked cuter and cuter.

The cold had made me realize,
How I wanted to cuddle her in my arms,

And save her from the chill,
And somehow her pains seemed to hurt me too.



Aachu! She sneezed again,
And I wanted to punch the cold,
For doing this to her,
And then she pinched me.

"You forgot to say - God Bless you"
She said angrily,
I gazed at her and asked,
"Will you marry me?"

And then she smiled and nodded a yes,
And asked me about the ring,
"I didn't have one", so I said,
Will a jacket do? And gave her that instead.

Who knew,
How a cold could change my Heart,
And make me fall in love,
With a girl who sneezed a lot!!!!

~A Poem By Fizz

10 comments:

  1. OK, that's weird. So the first one wasn't a fluke. Keep firing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Shovonc....You bet...Do check out the other poems as well...
      Life is never a fluke...Either we have it or not...

      Delete
  2. @nice imagination of cold love

    ReplyDelete
  3. I appreciate the style you word your thoughts and run your imaginations.This means, Yeah I read your previous poems too.
    Coming to this poem,I totally enjoyed funny word-plays: cold & summer.This poem is lovely till before "will you marry me". And a better selection of words and coherency in imagination could this poem even more lovelier and great!!

    Btw, there are some weird things that are confusing. You said, the gave her a sweater for a ring(Nice thought). But, summer is the climate you portrayed here. How could someone would wear a sweater in summer?. This poem would be more appealing if you have tried explaining the bleakness of love with winter. A slight emotional tinge was apparently missing in this poem.

    Looking for more nice works from you.
    Cheers
    -
    pistaboy! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Pistaboy!!!!

      I like the name, its different.

      I know that a better selection of words would add to the coherency in imagination, but I write what comes to my mind. You can blame me for simplicity, but I like it that way.

      Thanks for making me realize the logic of the sweater. I have however changed it to a Jacket, cause a Jacket is something one can wear in any weather...

      I am looking forward to more feedback from you....

      Cheers

      Delete
  4. A different style.Nice and Mushy. No matter what true love never fails and perhaps this says to me that you will never stop admiring their beauty even during their distress....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think what I want to portray here is a different kind of Love. The romantic type....

      Delete
  5. jacket for a ring makes more sense then the ring itself, your luv is not devoid of life and its facts, when luv is care its pure, i believe u worded 'care' in simplest and beautiful way,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well put - Unlike bark...
      Cant thank you enough for these kind words of yours. :)

      Delete

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